


The day Nurses Peter Groves and James Steward met Auror Potter

by rubarbe9



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Hospitals, Muggles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-09
Updated: 2017-09-09
Packaged: 2018-12-25 17:42:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12040953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubarbe9/pseuds/rubarbe9
Summary: 2017, a Muggle Hospital"He says his name is Harry Potter.""Do you think it might actually be his name, or he suffers from some kind of delusion?""Well, considering that he keeps asking for his wand...""Delusion, then."





	The day Nurses Peter Groves and James Steward met Auror Potter

**Author's Note:**

> A short stylistic exercise to practice dialogues and accents. I took one of my plot bunnies running around and went from there

**2017, a Muggle Hospital**

"He says his name is Harry Potter."

"Do you think it might actually be his name, or he suffers from some kind of delusion?"

"Well, considering that he keeps asking for his wand..."

"Delusion, then."

"Explain t’me why we always end up with the cuckoo ones again?"

"Must have something to do with the fact the boss hates your guts since you ate his pistachio doughnut..."

"It didn't have a name on it!"

"And you bought him an entire box of them the next day, yes, I know. Just answering your question. Move that stuff out of the way."

"Fella got seriously banged up. Pity too, he doesn't look too hard on the eyes..."

"I'm sure he'll be very happy to know you checked him out while he was sedated out of his mind. Pass me the compress, I need to change that one. Anyway, he's probably too old for you."

"Ya're not trying to convince me ta stop looking at patients as potential love interests?"

"I've given up. Choice of battles and all that. When did the constable say they'd be back?"

"Tomorrow morning. Said he was too agitated ta get any info out of him, and then Down decided ta sedate him. Hold that for me? They think he got mugg’d but they can't be sure it wasn't a planned aggression without his testimony."

“Well, if he's as coherent when he wakes up as when they brought him in, it won't make much of a difference, he'll be in for quite a long stay in a closed wing.”

"Twenty-five or fifty?"

"Twenty-five. We'll give him another one if he's still out at the end of our shift."

"'k. Think they'd commit him like this? I mean, we've seen na sign that he'd be dangerous. What's he gonna do? Yell Abracadabra at people?"

"It’s Avada Kedavra, dork, know your classics!”

“Whatever… Here, put tha’ back on the tray fer me.”

“Alright, that’s done. Who do we have next?”

“Ankle trauma in th’225. Apparently the old chap’s been whining about pins ‘n needles so Down said we should check the cast, see if it’s too tight.”

“At least he’s chattier than our delusional wizard. Can’t say that I mind him telling me about all the crazy costumers he carried around in his taxi…”

“Innit?! Did he tell you about the newlyweds tha’ tried ta cut a piece of the backseats as a souvenir fer their honeymoon?”

“No! But why? I mean, surely they’d have something more… romantic to bring back.”

“Somethin’ to do with a terrible honeymoon spent stuck in airports, ya’d have to ask him.”

“People really do the weirdest things…”

“Hi Mr O’Connell! How are ya today?”

“Grand tin’ you’re ‘ere, lads! Dare’re dohs needles in me scotch peg, I’d swear ter Bejasus it’s dryin’ me oyt loike an auld cob!”

“No worries here, sir, we’ll have ya sorted out in no time! Aren’t we, Jimmy?”

“Sure thing, Mr O’Connell. We wouldn’t want you to leave us with anything but the best memories.”

beep

“Jim?”

“Our John Smith-Potter’s heart is beating a bit fast. I’ll go check. I’ll be back like a light, Mr O’Connell. Peter, you good here?”

Beep

“’f course. So, Mr O’Connell, I’m going ta hav’ ta lower y’r bed, ‘s tha’ ok?”

Beep Beep Beep Beep

“Peter”

“Jus’ one minute, Mr O’Connell.”

“PETER!”

“’ere. Holly crap! What th’hell?”

BEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEP

“His heart’s spiking, give me the adrenaline!”

“Forget th’adrenaline, Jimmy, lad’s flying ove’ his bed!”

SLAM

“The door!”

“Locked”

“Peter, the adrenaline!”

CRASH

“Jimmy ya ok?”

“God, did that glass just tried to kill me?”

“Bleedin’ door won’t open!”

“Down!”

SHLANG

“Guess we’ll forget about the adrenaline”

“Nah shit! U’der the bed!”

“What do we do?”

“Ya’re th’one in charg’. I ain’t coming out of under tha’ bed ‘till ya figure th’effin’ levitatin’ circus, ya ‘ear me?”

“We could sedate him some more?”

KRSHHHH

“Bleedin’ good it did, innit, sedated folk’s runnin’ a mad house ‘ver our heads, fer Christ’ sake!”

“Shut up, Peter! I’m freaking out too, ok, but freaking out isn’t helping, so just take a bloody deep breath and think!”

Pop. Boom CLONG crash

“It stopped. Did it stop?”

“Seems like it. Ya reckon ‘e got scared of y’r yelling?”

“Idiot.”

“Wher’ ya goin’?”

“Well, I’m getting out, what? Do you plan to spend the rest of your day under the bed?”

“Nah, but…”

“The guy’s not there anymore.”

“What?”

“The nameless dude. He’s not on the bed anymore. Or levitating over it, for what’s it’s worth.”

“Tha’s not possible. I’d hav’seen it if he’d left by the door, and ya by the window.”

“Well, he’s not here. And honestly, I’d rather have him teleporting out than continuing to fly breakable stuff all around the room.”

“True.”

“…”

“What a mess. What d’ya reckon we tell the boss?”

“That Harry Potter just wrecked his room and magicked out?”

“Really?”

“No. Do you think we could say that he woke up, went crazy, just threw everything around and jumped out of the window?”

“Sounds reasonable. A lot more than… Actually, I think I’m just gonna pretend ta myself tha’ that’s what happen’d. Yeah, much better. No crazy disapearin’ chap and levitatin’ glass.”

“Right. Ok. So, O’Connell?”

“O’Connell.”

“...”

“Really, ya have ta talk to the boss for me ‘bout tha’ doughnut. No pastry’s worth patients tha’ crazy…”

“Keep dreaming, Peter. Keep dreaming.”


End file.
